Osama Bin Laden’s death is a huge blow to trainees and Camp Management

Osama bin Laden is dead! Saudi-born-Afghanistan-runaway Coach – whose escape from the jaws of death on so many occasions that it wasn’t even funny (“ref: American propaganda”), has finally been popped in Abbottabad, Pakistan.

The death comes as a fierce blow for cricket fanatics around the world, especially for the select few who were ‘under training’ at his Cricket camp.

Security has been beefed up across New York and Washington with SWAT teams raiding a number of sports shops in search of banned bats, balls and pads.

Fears are rife that cricket-fanatics will be taking out to the streets in Baghdad and Islamabad to condemn the cold-blooded murder of this revered coach.

According to information coming out from Chilgoza Gali – the place of the attack a few kilometres away from downtown Abbottabad, Kookaburra balls loaded with dynamite and bats filled with shrapnel were found lying in the change rooms.

Osama, who was touring Abbottabad for a summer camp, was killed on Sunday after his bookmaking scams got the better of him.

A teary-eyed Rashid Latif, who received constant guidance from the man, broke down when the scribe went to his home in Karachi for his comments, “He was an excellent mentor and coach. I am sad......”

Osama was popular around the globe for his revival of sports amongst the unprivileged masses, especially in Afghanistan.

Osama was born in Saudi Arabia to a Bedouin family which made cricket bats from date trees. One fine day, Osama’s father knocked down a date tree, only to find oil sprouting out from the soil. The rest as they say was history as Osama bought a Ferrari and became rich.

Soon, Osama realised that if he continued to follow his passion, making cricket bats, he might find more oil wells. The 1992 ICC Cricket World Cup inspired Osama to adopt Afghanistan – when his passion to make bats transformed into making ‘cornered fighters’ when he saw Pakistan emerging as the Champion.

Osama, after having watched what the Cup meant to Pakistani public, wanted to bring glory to Afghanistan, Pakistan’s neighbouring country.

By setting up secret camps across the war-torn country, Osama vetted the fresh, talented youth of Afghanistan in search of ‘hidden’ talent.

Despite training and working for the last 2 decades, the ICC did not induct Afghanistan in the 1996 World Cup. Osama, unfazed by the finger in the crimson, continued to practice. Funding wasn’t an issue either as India looked to search for new frontiers in their bid to bring shame to Pakistan.

The 1999 World Cup dump was a major disappointment to Osama and his squad. After over a year of planning, 2001 saw the Oricket (Osama’s team) squad strike back. The extra’s in the squad decided to protest against ICC’s policies.

ICC’s headquarters, which were housed in the World Trade Centre building in the US, was struck by two planes, allegedly hijacked by the 5 extra players from the Oricket squad.

ICC, however, shifted their headquarters to Dubai, dismissing the incident as a random act of terrorism.

The allegations saw Osama and his team being banned from all major International events. They had been looking to gain entry into the cash rich Indian Premier League (IPL), however, playing in India conflicted with several of the players’ religious beliefs.

Interestingly, Osama’s death is being linked to USA’s bid to enter International Cricket.

According to an anonymous source, “America has been working on a Cricket team since years, their progress has been slow but definite, a breakthrough is expected soon and Osama’s death may be related to it, especially since America wants their Cricket team in the next World Cup.”

Osama’s team is considered one of the most dangerous in the world, according to some eye-witnesses. The top order batsmen are capable of bringing whole airplanes down with a single hit.

Negotiations between Javed Miandad and Afghanistan Cricket Board Chairman Mullah Omar – stalled due to a bat-blast in September – are expected to continue in the days to come. Only time will tell if anyone will be able to fill the shoes of the Afghan/Saudi great.